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“Fake it till you make it” could be useful advice for some things in life—but not when it comes to your sex life. According to one study, more than half of cisgender women have faked an orgasm at some point. Nearly 60 percent!

There are a few reasons why people might fake an orgasm: being uncomfortable talking about sex, not wanting to hurt a partner’s feelings, being embarrassed. And it can just be easier to fake an orgasm than to tell our partners what does—and does not—make us feel good.

With a lot of stigma, shame, and baggage around orgasms and sex, no wonder some of us just fake it. The problem is, when we fake an orgasm, we let opportunities for real pleasure slip by.

In the latest episode of You Deserve Good Sex, sex educator Cassandra Corrado helps you prioritize your pleasure. Sure, it can be hard work, but it’s worth it.