On November 8, Donald Trump became the country’s next president. On November 8, I saw, clearly, where America stands: on the side of pure, unfiltered, and emboldened hate against anyone labeled “other,” against anyone who does not fit the mold of white male straightness.

I am not unfamiliar with the hate that pulses throughout this country. I have been called “nigger.” I have been groped, and I have been grabbed when I did not want it. I have been told that my chocolate skin does not warrant affection. But I held onto a small sliver of hope that my America was still better than this.

As this last campaign season played out, I often found myself laughing hysterically at the absurdity that was the 2016 presidential election—not the Ha-Ha Funny kind of hysterics, but the What-Is-Happening-Is-This-Real-Life kind of hysterics.

From the beginning, I knew that this election would be anything but normal. Hillary Clinton possessed decades of actual experience in the political realm, and Trump possessed absolutely no political knowledge and was infamous for being the mean star of a syndicated television show, The Apprentice. The answer as to who was the most qualified person to be the next president of the United States seemed blatantly obvious. And yet, to many voters, it apparently wasn’t. Trump’s campaign strategy played on the hate and fears of those afraid of “the other.”

Mexico is not our friend. “We get the killers, drugs & crime, they get the money!” Iran is “doing many bad things behind our backs.” The United States “has become a dumping ground for the world.” “We are letting criminals knowingly stay in our country.” “Get tough and smart U.S., or we won’t have a country anymore.” Hillary Clinton is crooked! “100% CONTROLLED.” Hillary Clinton is weak. Nasty woman.

This is just some of Trump’s hateful rhetoric that became a breeding ground for white nationalists around the country to band together to “take back what’s theirs” from nonwhite people they deem undeserving of existing in their same space. (The majority of white women, despite Trump’s record of misogynistic behavior and alleged assaults, cast their vote in favor of this language.) This is the hate speech that gave fuel to white supremacy’s backyard bonfire. I watched this fire burn bigger and brighter for months, hoping that come November 8, America would pull it together and extinguish this hot mess. Surely, I thought, the America that is my birthplace, the America that elected our first Black president just eight years ago, the America that enacted marriage equality across the country is better than this.

And we weren’t. We weren’t better.

Trump opened the gateways for white people around the country to finally ditch being “politically correct” and be honest. That’s what I kept hearing about Trump: that at least he was honest. Yes, honestly encouraging racist, bigoted ideas. And no, it did not surprise me that this kind of seething hate existed in our country. I see the disparities every day between white people and nonwhite people. I watch the news. Since Election Day, the Southern Poverty Law Center has counted more than 300 cases of hateful harassment or intimidation in the United States, suggesting that people are using Trump’s victory as justification to perform hateful actions. I hoped better for America. I hoped that there were more decent people than not.

Those who share in my status as “other” will understand the absolute heartbreak I felt in the wake of last week’s election results. And those of you who are too ignorant, privileged, or entitled to understand anything that you do not directly experience will not.

Congratulations, America. You did it. You took your country back. You took back a country that was never yours to take in the first place. You showed us where white nationalism stands in this country. You made America great again. Land of the free, white, misogynistic, racist, homophobic, xenophobic, hateful supremacists. Home of the brave, white, misogynistic, racist, homophobic, xenophobic, hateful supremacists.