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Sex educator Cassandra Corrado, host of Rewire News Group’s You Deserve Good Sex YouTube series, has always stressed the importance of communicating with your partner about what you want in bed. After all, you can’t have good sex without talking about what you like and don’t like.
Corrado is back with more advice, and this time, it’s all about what to do if you change your mind during sex.
When we say “change your mind,” we don’t mean slowing down or calling for a brief recess—but stomping on the brakes and coming to a full and complete stop.
There are many reasons why someone might change their mind during sex. And that’s totally OK. That’s how consent works.
You don’t owe anyone sex or the opportunity to reach orgasm, even if you initially said yes to having sex.
If you’re not sure what to say to your partner, or if you’re having trouble figuring out what happened that made you want to stop so that you (and your partner) can honor your sexual boundaries, this week’s You Deserve Good Sex is for you.
If you’ve ever experienced a situation where your partner didn’t stop when you asked them to, and you want to talk about it, the National Sexual Violence Resource Center and RAINN (the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) can connect you to someone who can help.