I have a black man complex. Not because I am bitter about the absence of my father during my upbringing and I therefore indirectly hate them. But because a majority of black men are my male counterparts, and their irresponsibility and failure to simply be present in the majority of black families in primarily poverty stricken ghetto’s across the nation, is self destructing the black family.

The rates of unplanned adolescent pregnancies are highest in the black community as well as the incidence and current prevalence of single parent (mother) homes. These two disproportionate circumstances go hand in hand. 1) It already incredibly stunts the women’s ability to pursue education because she has to stop and take care of her family. 2) In over 50% of these circumstances in black families the father does not contribute financially at all to assist with raising the child which contributes to the poverty and powerlessness of the black family unit. With the help of the father, the mother would not suffer as much financially, but that is never something most young black mothers can count on. Why is it that the black man is given the choice of taking the easy option out, when the majority of men in other cultures are dedicated to raising their children and helping the mother, regardless of whether it was their choice to have the child. And then just be fair, why doesn’t the black woman get a choice? Why is she forced to be both a mother and a father?

Oh I get it…because the mother births the child she is supposed to not only bring the baby into the world, but also provide food, clothes & shelter for her child because it’s her fault? She ends up sacrificing her professional growth, because she has to play the role of 2 parents and can’t afford to continue school, and has to work twice as hard to make ends meet because she doesn’t have the educational qualifications/skills to get a higher-paying job.  And because she is a woman, and the “giver of life”, it is her moral obligation to overcompensate and raise the child to the best of her ability in poverty, because Lord knows everyone from the pastor to the next door drug dealer would call her everything less of a woman if she were to abandon her child (As the father’s often so easily do). How dare she be think of herself?

Well at least it all makes sense now……The Black Man complex that is. Black women are and have been strong for their families since the slave owners completed emasculated their husband during slavery….so what’s 50 more years?